@arnellelozada -> The Bigger Picture.

Posted by arnellelozada on Wednesday, August 1, 2012 Under: SCRIPS

I've been through my share of heartbreak, but I've also been through my share of utter joy. I've had my overdoses of pain and anguish, but I've also had my overdoses of laughter and smiles. I've had those sleepless nights where you lay lifeless but awake, waiting for that person to call. I've also had the best night's sleep because that person was laying in bed right next to me. I've felt my chest cave in, but I've had those breaths of fresh air. I've felt the nausea that manifests when you subject yourself to the mercy of another, yet I've felt the butterflies that appear when you open your heart up to someone else. I've cried myself into a coma, and I've laid awake for hours cuddling. I've had the life drained out of me as a result of investing too much into something that was more a liability than anything else. But I've also felt what it's like to live again because someone restored my faith in humanity. I've literally collapsed from the pure intensity of the burn of betrayal, but I've also stood taller because someone made me feel like a better woman.

Life is bittersweet. Love is bittersweet. Tasting the bitter makes the sweet, sweeter. Anything in excess is never good. I don't care that my heart's been broken, I've mended it myself. I don't care that I've been betrayed, I stay honest. I don't mind that I've been let down, I pick myself back up. I've been swayed, my optimism has strayed...but in the end, there is nothing that can completely strip me of my faith in humanity. I know in my heart, that there are people out there worth getting to know. To wake up and realize that despite the fact that your previous relationships didn't work out, there's one out there that WILL last, is a beautiful thing. I love that those previous ones have helped teach me how to better myself and better love the one that IS right for me. I love knowing that I have the rest of my life to venture out into the world and pick and choose whom I let in, whom I want to come along with me for the ride. I love knowing that there are still people out there, thriving on everyday conversations and simply spreading the love and feel-good vibes that were meant for our generations. I love knowing that there are still people out there who smile, not frown, because they stepped in a puddle, and find simple joy in returning a lost item to its rightful owner. I love knowing that there are still people out there who want to be on "your team", and who want to get to know you in and out, without passing judgement.

I love knowing that there is a man out there, waiting to love me, with all my gleaming flaws. I love knowing that just as eager as I am to meet him, he feels the same way about me. I love knowing that even though those other guys weren't everything they said they were going to be to me, this one man WILL be. I love that as many times as I've been wrong, I will eventually be right. The simple fact that there is someone out there willing to love me the way I love me, is reason enough for me to keep putting one foot in front of the other, reason enough for me to keep on living, and reason enough for me to keep on loving. And despite how imperfect life may have been and will always be, my faith in the bigger picture, somehow makes it all so perfect.

This, my comrades and confidantes, is what it's like...when you open your eyes and SEE.

Love and respect,
Arnelle

In : SCRIPS

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